What to do, what to do

Sooo, been home for a bit now. Enjoying family, friends, food (too much food!) and just generally bumming about in comfy pajamas. Christmas lights are more magickal than I ever remember because it's been so long since I've seen them. Granted, there are some holiday decorations in Dubai but it's mostly for marketing. We had some holiday celebrations, which was a nice bit of fun. I freely admit that it wasn't Christmas for me until I came home. Christmas is where my friends and family are, even if they're on the moon.

I've had a really good time so far, snuggling into warm coats and hats and gazing wide-eyed at tiny little wisps of snow flurries. I've gone to parties, dinner, movies, and gotten to spend quality time with my family. Christmas Eve was a flurry of dinner and gifts, while Christmas Day was a pajama day enjoying my niece's fascination with her new tool bench and old Christmas movies. The Garfield Christmas Special never gets old, and neither does a Muppet Family Christmas. I love the old Charlie Brown Christmas, and Disney's Christmas Carol. Curling up inside a cup of tea with Mom on one end of the couch and Homestar sprawled in a nearby chair is home to me.

As I enjoy shopping for smaller pants (YES!!) and looking forward to a fantastic island wedding, I'm rather haunted by a decision I have to make. It's been creeping around the back of my mind for weeks. I was very depressed before I left Dubai, because this decision is looming.

I have to decide if I am staying abroad; my contract is up in June.

Soo....what to do....

Choices? There are several.

• Look for another position abroad. This would mean another two years.
• Stay in Dubai for a third year.
• Move back home.

Let me tell you, I have gone around and around in my head about this. It's been giving me a headache for weeks ever since I got the letter of intent from my principal. It's due signed on January 15th, the day I get back to school from the holidays.

The time is coming; I have to make a decision. I have a feeling the sooner I decide the better off I will feel.

Choice A, signing on in another country, is tempting. New school, new place, different administration and people...but it means another two years. Frankly, when I have this conversation with my coworkers they always seem surprised to find that I don't want teaching abroad as a permanent career. I planned on spending a few years abroad for teaching experience and travel opportunities and then taking that experience home to teach Reading and ESL in our schools. I don't think I want another two years abroad. I also can't think of any other place I would like to live. Sure, there's places in Europe (would kill to live in Florence or Rome), but the taxes and cost of living are killers. I wouldn't save a dime.

Choice B, staying in Dubai a third year, well, that's got its issues. You see, the investors are clamoring for a return on their investment. So next year, they are going to overcrowd our school. They are taking away classrooms from most of the specialists except for art and music. I will get a smaller room, wouldn't put it past them to put me on a cart actually. Their standards are about to take a dive in an effort to pack the school and get tuitions so the school turns more of a profit. This is one of my big issues; this is a for-profit school. Sticks in my throat, it does. Personally, I'm not done travelling yet. However, Dubai is still the best location to travel from. I can get anywhere from Dubai in 15 hours or less. Daily life is pretty easy. Most people speak some semblance or at least a few words of English. Many signs are in English. I have some good friends there; I have a small social network established. Professionally, three years' continuity at one school looks better than two. I have an excellent and experienced teaching partner; I want to be as good as she is when I grow up.

Choice C, coming home...
I'm not going to lie, I've been frustrated and lonely enough to seriously consider it. I miss my family and friends. My nieces and cousins are getting bigger, and I'm missing chunks of their lives. My smallest niece doesn't really know me. That hurts a bit. I'm missing important events, like weddings, babies, etc. I miss nerding out with the gaming crew, dressing like a pirate, and kayaking at night on Nockamixon. Still, a couple of wise friends reminded me that friends and family will still be there whenever I decide to come home. And it is still home, mind you. A friend got kind of upset when I referred to Dubai as home the other day. Home is where I live, but the real home is with my family and friends.

There are other issues, but they're kind of silly. I feel like I'm getting old sometimes, and so many of my friends are paired up, having families...I don't want to all of a sudden turn around  after staying abroad and I'm 40 with four cats...Yeah, I'm being silly. I get like that sometimes. I'm a rather distrusting, self-preserving sort when it comes to relationships so letting guys get close is...difficult. LOL I know, can I make my life any more difficult?? Sheesh...don't listen to me. I'm an idiot.

Sooo, what to do, what to do? 

I'll be honest. I am leaning toward a third year in Dubai. Professionally, it gives me more experience and continuity. Financially, I will come home with a gratuity big enough after three years that I could float for a year in the US while trying to find a job. Personally, I would be able to travel more to places like Australia, Greece, France, Italy (again ;), and wherever else I can get to. It would also give people more opportunity to save their pennies and perhaps meet me abroad someplace :)

I don't know, I go back and forth. I have until January 15th to commit...or be committed LOL